While at the beach, I watched this little boy waiting expectantly under the large buckets at the splash pad. He had hit the activation button just a few seconds ago and was waiting until those buckets filled up. Standing right under where they would dump the water that had been building.
I cannot even imagine what would possess a person to stand under a bucket of cold water. If I have to choose between a cold shower or not showering, I will just put on a little extra perfume. Remember? I am allergic to cold.
In the months following Daniel’s death, I remember waiting expectantly. But I wasn’t expecting good things. My son had just died and so all other “bad” things were fair game. I remember dreading each next phone call or interaction. What else could go wrong? I had heard that when it rains, it pours.
And quite honestly, just like I would have opted out of the cold shower, I would have liked to have opted out of the whole “losing a son, grieving and world being turned upside down” thing. Thank you very much.
But here’s the thing. I was wrong. My expectations were wrong. Instead of expecting God to show up and work amidst my life, I expected more bad things to happen to me. I suddenly began to think of myself as a modern day Job.
Over the years (and especially through our baby losses), I have learned to take everything to the Lord. EVERY. THING. And I have learned/realized what a sin is is to doubt our Lord and Savior.
I have learned to expect great things from God. I have learned to expect to see Him at work in the good and the “bad.” I know that in all things I must turn to Him. I must give EVERYTHING to Him – the good, the bad, and the proverbial ugly.
He can use it for His glory and His good, when we surrender it all to Him.
“Trust in the Lord, and do good; dwell in the land and befriend faithfulness. Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord; trust in Him and He will act.” ~Psalm 37:3-4
“In God, whose word I praise, in God I trust; I shall not be afraid.” ~Psalm 56:4
“Let not your hearts be troubled. Believe in God; believe also in me.” John 14:1
“Expect great things from God. Attempt great things for God.” ~William Carey